I screwed up tremendously, broke his heart into a million pieces, and when I finally came to my senses a few months later, I realized I needed help. He supported me, stood by me, until I relapsed and then threatened to leave (rather than support me) if it happened again. Well I got sober. And here we are, 9 years down the line, and the only thing I can think about is how much I miss the man I was with those first 3 years. I understand that he is still hurt and is mistrusting, but I am no longer sugar daddy apps that person, because my addiction turned me into someone even I didn’t recognize. I would never do that to him again and I know I wouldn’t, bc my addiction influenced my infidelity.
He doesn’t tell me he loves me anymore on the phone or otherwise (in the past he was ALWAYS telling me, he told me numerous times a day even after the infidelity) and he isn’t intimate when does visit (around twice a month)
The cheating only lasted a short time, but for a few years, he still remained the same person and was loving and caring and so very honest after I became sober. Now, the current issues: The past TWO YEARS, he has barely come to spend time with me, he is cold, calculating, gets angry if I mention the issues in our relationship, he barely calls/texts me so I’ve stopped initiating contact with him bc I was practically begging him to keep in touch. Also, he blames everything on me, quite literally, and never takes responsibility for his own actions or words.